I feel like I am still falling down the rabbit hole.
Life has suddenly changed and yet is still the same. Small things like doing the food shopping are tinged with melancholy and sadness, as like every detail of my life, they are no longer shared with my dog. There is no happy face in the window when I come home, nor is there one buried in my shopping bags searching for a treat.
Everything is a little darker today as hubby had to return to work, meaning, for the most part, I would be alone today. I don't like how it feels. Just when you think that perhaps it might be getting better, that boulder of heavy grief weighs you down, reminding you that you are still carrying it. I know that with time, it will gradually be worn down enough to feel happy again, but it's something I will carry with me for life, because I just loved him too much. He will be forever engraved on my heart - it will continue to love him with each beat, until the last one reunites us.
Cooking was something I have been putting off as we always did it together - he was never far from my side when food was involved. My husband, bless him, tried to be the cook, but it's just not something he enjoys doing, so most days we have had late lunches from cafes, and then very late cooked eggs, and perhaps only one or two dinners (not including the wonderful meals my mother dropped off in the first few days to help us stay nourished). I feel it's time for me to get back into the kitchen, as hard as it will be, but someone needs to do it because I'm getting a little bored of eggs (sorry sweetie :).
ease: 5/5.
prep time: 3mins.
cooking time: 15mins.
total: 18mins.
taste: 4.5/5. A flavour parade in your mouth.
Hubby even suggested there might be too much flavour, but nonetheless he thoroughly enjoyed this dish.
I substituted the blue cheese for an goat's cheese marinated in olive oil, peppercorns and thyme as I didn't want the figs to be overwhelmed by a bitey blue.
would I make it again: Yes.
recipe: Chicken paillard with fresh fig salad & blue cheese
I know. It will get easier. The memory will still be sad, but you'll be able to manage better.
ReplyDeleteI know the feeling.. hardest thing to get is the passing of a loved one.. time heals I think.. I still feel sad thinking of my dogs, long gone, but mostly I remember the good times :)
ReplyDeleteIt isn't easy and it takes time to get used to such a loss...
ReplyDeleteThis dish is nonetheless fantastic!
cheers,
Rosa
golly-ned, you're breaking my heart. i'm so sorry the wound is still so fresh--hang in there.
ReplyDeleteon a much brighter note, this is one gorgeous dish. figs must be one of god's most beautiful creations and you've highlighted them nicely!
I promise it will get better, with every passing day. I've lost so many family members (pets included!) in my life, but through all that, you must strive to be happy, to be the best you can be and enjoy YOUR life as much as you can.
ReplyDeleteEven though I've only discovered your blog recently, I love it, and you are such a beautiful person, you must let that keep shining through.
Sending you lots of love and warm hugs and sunshine and positivity and happiness xxx
Thank you for all of the comforting comments :)
ReplyDelete